Gonzo

Gonzo, brother of Watto, Rebo, and Greedo, was really not that great a guy. Want to know about his sorry-ass life? Well read on.

Biography
Even in childhood Gonzo was easily recognisable as the dumbest of his brothers. He had a brief stint at a university where he and his brothers formed the comedic ensenmbele The Max Bros.. While Watto and Rebo were known for offending college professors and the physically handicapped with their roles, Gonzo was famous for his racially and ethnically offensive roles. He would often star as a bizarre mixed-marriage love-child with a terrible Wookiee accent.

Unable to get a job because of his offensive acting, Gonzo sought refuge in the only place hospitable to deviants of his kind, the Mos Eisley cantina. High on cheap Blue Milk he decided it was a good idea to try and sell the stuff to imperial stormtroopers and was arrested.

After a brief time in jail Gonzo resumed his role as a burden on society by trying to peddle Frog and wookiee porn. It was in this capacity that he met Kermit and was hired on the spot to be his body guard. Gonzo spent many wonderful years guarding Kermit until one day Kermit stole from him the love of his life, Miss Piggy. Gonzo left Kermit (which led to Kermit's ultimate demise) and tried to drown his sorrow's by joining the intergalactic party circuit.

The morning after Lando's Super Carbonite Rave Party Gonzo found himself lying next to a dead Mandalorian male escort. He promptly stole the escort's passport and went into hiding on the Mandalorian Homeworld.

Gonzo's Last Stand
Gonzo tried to make a living in the Mandalorian underworld by hosting secret book-readings of his brother's book A Guide to Mandalorian Relations but this proved to be his downfall as he was soon discovered by a group of wookiee tourists who wanted him to host an interactive session. Faced with the prospect of mass wookiee-nookiee, Gonzo chose to end his own life.

Legacy
Gonzo has become somewhat of an icon to racial bigots across the galaxy. The underground holomovie circuit is flush with movies about his last stand where he is portrayed heroically, such as I Choose to Wook the Other Way, or How Many Frogs Does it Take to Screw in a Lightbulb.