Darth Taffy

Darth Taffy was a man who belives Candy can talk. He was once one of the 8 Clayfighters from Clayfighter Wars - Judgement Clay.

Childhood
He had a miserable child. On the day of his birth, he was spanked 1,000,900,000,678 times a second. His ass became sore so when he went to school he had a stand up desk. He always pooped Pop Tarts and Chocolate Kisses and peed Ice Cream, so he usually saw boys eating out of the toilets. The teachers banned Taffy for his differences, mainly his poo and pee problems and his belief for candy talking.

Bachelorhood and Adulthood
When he was 23, he first decided to go to Tatooine, so he called for a interstellar taxi cab to take him there. When he got there, He saw Darth Vader at a beer stand and asked him for change-

Taffy: Hey bitchead, your ass sucks, well, ass!

Vader: What the hell, a talking dildis?

Taffy: Gimme some change ASSSSSSHHHOOOLLLEEE!

Vader: This is not the change you are looking for!

-Taffy and Vader