Yoda

"I'm Yoda! I'm a soulja. I'll mold ya and fold ya. I thought I told ya! Don't be unwise, judge me not by my size. You won't believe your eyes, watch the X-wing rise!"

- Yoda

Yoda was a frog who was born a very long time ago, he was about 0.66 meters high and was born on an unknown planet of which he never spoke...we think. (Three quarters of the time, nobody could understand Yoda.)

Early life
"When rapping, in proper grammar Yoda speaks, mmmmm!"

- Yoda explaining his gangsta inconsistencies

He was forced to leave his homeworld when he was 30 years old because a war was about to destroy the planet. He did not want to leave his sweetheart, Yaddle, a beautiful young Frog, behind. So he kidnapped her and together they left to planet to forfle their dreams. Yoda had always wanted to be a dental hygenist until someone got him drunk one night and convinced him that he wanted to be a Jedi Knight. Although Yaddle had second thoughts, she did not want him to make the dangerous journey to the Republic alone. Later on in their relationship, they spawned a love-child by the name of Kermit.

Fall to the Dark Side
"Speak not to me in that manner, for TFSU you should."

- An enraged Yoda towards Yaddle

Yoda became a promising Jedi, but, one day he saw Yaddle with another man. This is when his Fall to the Dark Side began, he wanted revenge, he was determined to destroy the man that threatened take his sweetheart away from him.

Later life
"Bend over, show me your dark side you will!!"

- Yoda at home having some "Happy Time"

Rumor has it he became a rapper after his fall, cursing Yaddle in his raps.

Behind the scenes
"The Force is in everything. It surrounds us. Binds us together. It's in the rock. Your car. Your boner on the subway. It's in that nice hoochie's ass in the tight leather pants. The kind you just wanna smack and go, 'Piyow, bitch!'"

- Yoda explaining the Force in a line provided by Larry King, himself

Yoda was portrayed in the Star Wars films by Father Time himself, Larry King.