Gordon Shumway

"You can shave a Nerf many times but you can only skin him once"

- Willie

Biography
Gordon Shumway was a failed stand up comedian who tried to become a Sith Lord. After Animal Goldberg Fett Destroyed his planet he found himself stuck on Earth (where ever the hell that is). During a visit to Utah (the birthplace of Evil) he dicided to become a Sith Lord. He made a checklist in order so make sure he had everything a Sith Lord should have.

Rise and fall
First off he needed a Lightsaber which he created from junk in Willies garage. Second of all he needed a really sinister cloak which he made from Willies curtains. Thirdly he needed a secret Sith temple from where he would execute his heinous plans, he used Willies fishing lodge in Alaska as a base of operations. Now with his Sith checklist complete nothing stood in the way of his everlasting dominion.........or so he thaught, Willie however was extremely pissed of with Gordon Shumway and kicked him in the balls for destroying his curtains and stealing is Alaskan fishing lodge. Gordon Shumway ignited his Lightsaber to finish Willie off only to realize it was not working, then he tried to fry his former minion with Force Lightning which was succesfull for a period. Willie was knocked down and his glasses were removed from his dorky face. Just when Gordon Shumway was about to finish his adversary off, Willie picked up his glasses and some sunlight passed through. As the beams hit the glass they were magnified and scorched Gordon down to a crisp. The End