Wookiee sandwich

Ok, ok, now let's just get this straight right from the get go- I can not express exactly how important this is but remember: never, under any circumstances, ever, ask for a wookiee sandwich. Never. Don't even ask what they are, don't even bring them up in conversation, don't even think about them. Ever.

Now, now, I know what you're thinking, a sandwich- two loaves of bread with something savoury in between- how bad could it be? Well there are certain other interpretations that....no no! Even the thought is beyond horrifying! Never bring it up, never discuss it in front of wookiees and never ask for one on Kashyyyk. In fact, just reading this article is asking for it....hold on a sec...is that a pair of wookiees behind you right now??

Looks like we won't have to destroy your planet. At least you didn't ask for a wookiee swiss-cheese.....