Tikkes

"Spooooooon!"

- Tikkes

Tikkes was a corrupt but not necessarily evil Quarren Senator from Dac. During the Clone Wars, he became a turncoat and joined the Confederacy of Independent Systems. He became a high-ranking member of the Separatist Council, along with Wat Tambor and Shu Mai and Poggle the Lesser.

Tikkes was a parasitical lifeform that engorged himself by drinking the blood of mammalian beings. If you or your children have been walking through the tall grass or in the woods, you should check yourself for Tikkes. Check the hair first, then the scalp. Search the hair thoroughly with a fine-toothed comb. Strip naked, then check your armpits and your naughty bits. Shake out your clothes for good measure. Tikkes was known to spread Lyme disease and Mount Sorrow spotted fever.

Darth Vader slaughtered Tikkes with the rest of the Separatist Council, but was sure to check for infestation afterward and thus avoided an itchy scalp and flaky skin.