Simple Darthipedia:Mos Eisley Shitport/Bleebs Legacy

There once was a writer who's work is obscure that currently no one understands it. Like many misunderstood geniusses before him, his work will probably not be appreciated by the general public for about 200 years. This page is created to show everyone we were the first to acknowledge 's talent.

=The Leutinant=

The Leutinant was a Big, Fat, Stupid Fluffie from Hoth. He worked for Darth Cha-Cha. Anyway, he died from food poisoning during the Battle of Yomamama.

=The Battle of Yomamma= The Battle of Yomamama was the last battle of the Galactic-Ultra-Insanely Bloody-Cat,Kitty,Feline,etc.-War. Yippee!

=Galactic-Ultra-Insanely Bloody-Cat,Kitty,Feline,etc.-War= The Galactic-Ultra-Insanely Bloody-Cat,Kitty,Feline,etc.-War was a war between the Cat, Kitty, Feline, etc. species and the Big Doggy Woggies, led by Darth Cha-Cha.

The Start
This war started out like most wars. Someone was pissed. Darth Cha-Cha was pissed at all the Cats, Kitties, and Felines, etc. So he decided that he would kill them all. Yep. Anyway, Cha-Cha organized a racist hate group called the Big Doggy Woggies. These were solders with the most high-tech weapons and the most bestest fighting skillz in the galaxy. They were unstoppable.

The End...
After many years of fighting pointless battles with pointless blood and gore, Darth Cha-Cha and the Big Doggy Woggies found the Cat, Kitty, Feline, etc. homeworld. They realized that the map they had been using was upside down, So they turned it around and discovered Yomamama. When the Battle of Yomamama started, Kitty Witty and Darth Cha-Cha, the two generals of the two armies that were fighting, met in Kitty Litter Square and started a Yo Mama contest. In the Kitty Witty won. Yeah, she won. Hooray. Yippee.

=Yomamama=

The Awesome Description
Yomamama was a not so important planet in the Mid Rim. It was the home planet of Kitty Witty.

=Yo-Mamaopolis= "If you can't insult their mom, insult their mom's mom"

- Yomamaopolis Motto

Yomamaopolis was the capital city of Yomamama. The Galactic Yo-Mama Contest was held there every year.

=The Big Doggy Woggies= The Big Doggy Woggies were a racist hate group of canine warriors led by Darth Cha-Cha.

A Long, Bloody, Boring, History
The Big Doggy Woggies were made two thousand years before the Galactic-Ultra-Insanely Bloody-Cat, Kitty, Feline, etc.-War ended. They fought many long and pointless battles to destroy all Cats!(and kittys and felines, etc.) The Big Doggy Woggy's were made up of dogs from across the galaxy. Chihuahuas, Fluffies, Bark-A-Lots, and even PUGs. After the war, they disappeared... =Darth Cha-Cha=

"F*ck You, Kitty Witty"

- Darth Cha-Cha, to Kitty Witty in battle

Darth Cha-Cha was the most powerfullest Sith ever. No one knows when or where he was born, nor do they care. Cha-Cha was the one who created the deadly "Skweekee Toy" lightsaber technique.

His life and stuff he did...yeah
His career started when he was two years old. On his home planet, he saw some kittens and killed them. Don't ask me why, I have not idea whatsoever. Anyway, his parents thought that it was a little creepy so they sent him to a psychiatrist. But, not any psychiatrist. They sent him to Darth Psychiatrist! Muwhahaha! On Cha-Cha's first appointment, he killed Darth Psychiatrist when he accidentally created his "Skweekee Toy" technique. He then killed some kittens for fun, and escaped.

I Hate Kitties!
After a couple years of hiding out in the backwaters of the galaxy, Cha-Cha led a campaign against all Cat's, Kitty's, Felines, etc. Anywho, his war against these creatures became known as the Galactic-Ultra-Insanely Bloody-Cat,Kitty,Feline,etc.-War. This horrible war went on for two thousand years until he met Kitty Witty. The last epic battle of the Galactic-Ultra-Insanely Bloody-Cat,Kitten,Feline,etc.-War took place in Yo-Mamaopolis, on the small planet of Yomamama. They fought for hours on end until Kitty Witty cut off his head. The End. Yeah, so Cha-Cha is, like, dead now.

=Darth Psychiatrist= Darth Psychiatrist was just some nerd. That's right: a nerd.

Nerdling
Darth Psychiatrist was not even a Sith. Instead, he merely dressed up as one, got a degree in psychology, and met Darth Cha-Cha, who proved to be his first and last customer. He got his head blow off by the "Skweekee Toy" lightsaber technuiqe.

=Cat, Kitty, Feline, etc. species= The Cat, Kitty, Feline, etc. species was a species of Cats, Kitties, Felines, etc. Their society was divided into the four groups, listed below. Kitty Witty was a Cat, Kitty, Feline, etc, as was the Sith Mega-Super-Overlord known as Darth LOLCat. Anyway, these little guys were very good at persuading people to do stuff because of their big cute eyes and their fluffy fur and...well, you get the point.

Cat
Usually the big, fat, lazy ones. They didn't really do anything except eat.

Kitty
These were the cute ones! Everybody loved them because they were so cuddly, wuddly! Sometimes they could be a real pain in the ass though.

Felines
These were the geeks of the species. They usually got jobs as scientists and crap like that.

Etc.
How the hell should I know what this means? It probably means some other cats, or kittys, or feline. I don't know.

=Kitty Witty= "Yo mama's so fat that she's fat! What the f*ck?"

- Kitty Witty to Darth Cha-Cha

Episode 3.5: the Description of Kitty Witty
Kitty Witty was from the planet Yomamama, the home-world of the Cat, Kitty, Feline, etc. species. She was brown. Yeah, she was brown. Amazing huh? Anyway, she was the only one of her species to become a Jedi.

Birth and Childhood
Kitty Witty was born about fifty years before the end of the Galactic-Ultra-Insanely Bloody-Cat,Kitty,Feline,etc.-War on the planet Yomamama. She grew up like all kittens on Yomamama; she had Yo Mama contests! As a child she was shunned from most Yo Mama contests because she, well, sucked. That's right, she sucked at Yo Mama jokes. None of the other kittens wanted to play with her so she studied Jediism (that's how she became a Jedi if you weren't paying attention). Anyway, when she was about fifteen, she left Yomamama and went to SumRandumbPlanit.

The Creation of Suck-Up-Ism
While Kitty Witty studied Jediism on SumRandumbPlanit, she developed a knew Jedi mind trick called Suck-Up-Ism. This trick tricks people into tricking themselves to trick the Suckup into tricking them to do anything they ask. Yeah, I know it's complicated, but deal with it.

Anyway, this mind trick worked surprisingly well, actually. She did it on her teachers, on her classmates, and even on the mailman.

How she met Darth Cha-Cha
One day, as Kitty Witty was walking through the streets of SumRandumbPlanit, people came screaming:

"He's Here!! Waaaaa!! He's Here!!" This surprised Kitty Witty as much as it would surprise you and me. But she wasn't afraid. Actually, she was quite bored so she waited until all the screaming people came rushing buy. After they had all gone she saw HIM. The most terrifying being in all the universe: DARTH CHA-CHA!

"Who the Hell are you?" was the first thing that came out of Kitty Witty's mouth.

Darth Cha-Cha was astonished.

"What?" he said.

"I said, who the hell are you?"

Cha-Cha's soldiers laughed their head off when she said this because they knew what Cha-Cha would do. He pulled out his Skweekee Toy lightsaber and started to fight Kitty-Witty. Much to his surprise, Kitty-Witty pulled out a lightsaber to. They fought and fought until Darth Cha-Cha fell down, dead. Dead tired that is. He'd just got his ass kicked by a cat. Darth Cha-Cha got back on his horse and said:

"Until we meet again, F*ck you Kitty Witty!"

What Happened Next? I'll tell you.
Kitty Witty enlisted in the Cat, Kitty, Feline, etc. army and fought the armies of Darth Cha-Cha for many years until one day, a messenger was sent from Darth Cha-Cha himself. Right when Kitty Witty saw him, she said:

"This! Is! Cata!"

She then kicked him in the chest and broke his rib. The messenger said:

"Oh F*ck!! That really hurts! I mean come on, that hurts like a Mother F****r!!"

The cats cheered on Kitty Witty on and made her their general! Yippee!

The last fight, ever!
Still, Kitty Witty fought for many more years until the battle led to her home planet. Now she was mad. Now she was angry. NOW SHE WAS F*CKIN PISSED!!! How dare they touch her home planet! This time she was going to fight Darth Cha-Cha himself. As the Battle of Yomaopolis raged on, Darth Cha-Cha and Kitty Witty met at Kitty Litter Square and started to fight. But it wasn't lightsaber fighting, it was Yo Mama fighting! Words and insults flew for hours and hours until it was Kitty Witty's turn. She couldn't think of anything so she said this:

"You mama's so fat that she's fat!"

Time stopped. It was the worst Yo Mama comeback ever. Even today, it's the worst insult ever. Anyway, Darth Cha-Cha was so surprised of her stupid joke that he didn't notice Kitty Witty slice his head off. I know it's kind of graphic, but it's the truth. So, in the end, Kitty Witty killed Darth Cha-Cha and the Galactic-Ultra-Insanely Bloody-Cat,Kitty,Feline,etc.-War

Drunkard Party!
When the war ended, Kitty Witty was so happy that she threw a beer party that lasted for twenty years. It ended when they found Kitty Witty dead from drinking too much beer. Anyway, The End.