Darth Elmo

"Elmo hates you."

- Darth Elmo

Darth Elmo, also known as Darth Elmo the Treacherous, was a Sith Mega-Super-Overlord known for being more evil than any other being in the Galaxy. He was so evil, in fact, that his attempt to set up his own Galaxy-spanning Sith Empire failed only because he turned on himself, in what later Sith would enviously call "the ultimate act of treachery." He was most dangerous in that he could easily deceive others with that stupid grin on his face and then unleash a world of hurt on them. He specialized in the Tickle torture.

He was the head of the cruel organization known as Sesame Street, that specialized in destroying planets. Darth Elmo never trained an apprentice because he was too paranoid. He didn’t trust anyone, not even himself. He was trained in the ways of the Sith and the ways of the juicer by Darth Jawa, a Jawa Dark Lord of the Sith. Duh! Darth Elmo spent most of his life working for Darth Darth Binks, he destroyed many planets in his relatively short life. Although he was evil enough to destroy his boss, he was unable to do so before he betrayed and murdered himself.

Early in life
Darth Elmo was born on Endor. Who his parents were is unknown. When they wanted a second baby, Darth Elmo killed them and everyone who knew them because he felt they had betrayed him; he was three years old at the time. Two months later, he met Darth Jawa who was a member of a religion named the Brotherhood of the Bird. Jawa's master, Big Bird, ordered Jawa to find a suitable apprentice, in which he found Elmo. Training him in the ways of the Force, Jawa also taught him how to make the most delicious Jawa Juice. Several months later, his training was complete, so to test his abilities, Big Bird ordered Jawa to try to juice him. Darth Elmo escaped the juicer before Darth Jawa activated it, and after passing the test, Big Bird ordered Elmo to kill Jawa, which he did without thought. Bird deemed Elmo too evil to become an official member of the Brotherhood. However, he was promoted to Master Juicer. After the promotion, he was sent to Darth Small, who trained him for several weeks. After the second training was over, he was then promoted to Sith Lord. Small ordered him to assemble a planet destruction team, immediately.

Sesame Street
After meeting Darth Small, he traveled to a distant unknown planet where he found a group of idiots Sesame Street. During the next few months, he trained Sesame Street in the arts of planet destruction. When their training was complete, they went to Daantooiine VII and destroyed the planet, killing all Daantooiinians on the planet and possibly wiping out the entire species. Darth Small rewarded them by giving them all a bag filled with cookies.... small cookies. When the other Sith Lords learned about the destruction of Daantooiine VII, they all wanted to hire Sesame Street. But only a few of them were lucky enough to be able to pay them. After the cookie incident, Darth Elmo decided that they would tell any future clients to pay before destruction; this meant that they would be able to decide if they were going to destroy the planet or not after they got paid. At one point, Kermit joined Sesame Street, but he was kicked out two days later because he failed to destroy a planet.

Working for Darth Darth Binks
"Yousa will be my personal idiots.... ehhh... mesa means planet destruction team."

- Darth Darth Binks

When they tried to KABOOM! a planet once, they failed. Darth Elmo thought they would never be hired to destroy a planet ever again, but he was wrong. Darth Darth Binks hired them and wanted them to become his private planet destruction team. They destroyed many planets for Darth Darth Binks and sometimes, they were also allowed to destroy a planet just for fun. Darth Darth Binks paid them with many very big cookies, and he also rewarded them by giving them their own frigate, the Sesame Street Frigate. One of the planets they destroyed was Xantago XVVIII, which was presumed to be an uninhabited planet, but Darth Elmo had discovered that one of Darth Darth Binks' enemies had built a base on the planet which meant it was indeed inhabited. When Elmo told Darth Darth Binks about this, he ordered the immediate destruction of the planet. Darth Elmo planned the destruction carefully: he told Ernie to prepare the explosives while they traveled to Xantago XVVIII. Once they got to the planet, Ernie piloted their ship, Bert placed the explosives, and the other members killed anyone that tried to stop them.

After the mission to Xantago XVVIII, Darth Darth Binks promoted Darth Elmo to Sith Overlord. Elmo was now one step away from being Darth Darth Binks' second in command and two steps away from his own empire.

An impossible mission
Darth Darth Binks made sure Darth Elmo had more than enough planets to destroy: sometimes he and Sesame Street destroyed as much as 3 planets a week. On very rare occasions, they had to destroy moons, and on one such occasion they managed to wipe out an entire planet by destroying its moon. The mission to Yoyo started normal, but soon Darth Elmo came the conclusion that it was impossible to destroy the planet, as there were too many soldiers defending it. At first he had no idea how they were going to complete their mission, but Bert Darth Elmo had a great idea: he figured out that if they destroyed the planets moon the explosion would devastate the planet and kill every one on it. After they had destroyed the moon, destroying the planet was very easy since there was nobody left alive to defend it. In fact this was the easiest destruction in the history of planet destruction.

Twi'leks
When he was 10 years old, he found out he was terribly allergic to Twi'leks. After he discovered this, he decided to kill every Twi'lek he saw. There was just one Twi'lek that managed to escape him: Aayla Secura. She escaped while Darth Elmo was killing fanboys who were drooling over her. He also tried to destroy the Twi'lek home world, but Darth Darth Binks ordered him not to do it because he loved Twi'leks too much. Darth Elmo never understood why his master liked the Twi'lek dancers, but now he finally knew why he hated them so much. Disregarding his Masters orders to leave the Twi'lek home world alone he ordered his Hand Darth Animal to Destroy Ryloth in a super secret Sesame Street Black-Op mission.

Building an Empire
After Darth Elmo and Sesame Street had destroyed 1,000 planets for Darth Darth Binks, Elmo was given another promotion, becoming a Sith Super-Overlord. After being told there were a few planets that resisted Darth Darth Binks' empire, Darth Elmo was ordered to conquer these planets and use them to start his own empire. Two months later, he and Sesame Street had conquered 4 of the planets and destroyed 64 of them. At this time Darth Elmo received a job offer that involved the death of Bert and Ernie, two members of his Planet Destruction team. Elmo wasn't very happy about this, so he spent weeks looking for tracked down and confronted the person responsible for the offer. It turned out turned out that Darth Bob was this person, upon seeing a Pissed off Elmo, bob ran like hell, Elmo blew his Planet up and never saw him again. Darth Darth Binks was so pleased, he promoted Elmo again. Elmo was now an Sith Mega-Super-Overlord and he ruled 4 very small planets his own empire. In little less than a year, Darth Elmo conquered another 2 planets and destroyed over 300 planets. His empire was growing fast, very fast. When he was 12 years old he had conquered a ridiculously small amount many planets. Now that he had his own empire, he promoted himself to Sith Mega-Super-Overlord Darth Elmo.

The ultimate act of treachery
"I did it, I defeated myself. Now I will rule the......"

- Darth Elmo's last words

When Darth Elmo was 13 years old, he had conquered eight planets built an empire, but he did not trust himself. He feared that he would try to take his empire away from himself. One day, while he was plotting to kill his boss and take over his empire, he "accidentally" activated his lightsaber and wounded himself; after this incident had proven that he could not trust himself. Darth Elmo started to prepare for the time when he would attack himself, he planned to continue plotting to kill Darth Darth Binks as soon as he had defeated himself. Three weeks later at his fourteenth birthday he attacked his treacherous self, dueling himself for seven hours before he finally defeated and killed himself. It is not known if the treacherous Darth Elmo or the real Darth Elmo won. This act would later be known as "the ultimate act of treachery," and every Sith Lord was amazed by the news and generations of Sith envied Darth Elmo for this act. Even Darth Darth Binks was not as evil as Darth Elmo was. After Darth Elmo's death, Darth Sorrow cried for 14 weeks. It is unknown if he cried this long because Elmo was 14 years old when he was killed by himself or if it was just a coincidence. Now that Elmo was dead, he was also unable to assassinate Darth Darth Binks and take over a few more planets the entire universe.

Personality and traits
"Darth Elmo was the most treacherous Sith Lord, he was even more treacherous than me"

- Darth Jawa after he heard about Darth Elmo's ultimate act of treachery

Darth Elmo would be remembered as the most evil and treacherous Sith Mega-Super-Overlord, but he was not always like this. When he was younger he was very cute little puppet, but his parents, who lived with the Ewoks on Endor, and their evil treachery made him who he was. They wanted another child while they already had Elmo; this made Elmo very angry, so he killed them. Elmo became an evil and treacherous Sith Lord, but in reality he was more treacherous than any one imagined, even going as far as to send his "friend" Darth Pillsbury to a gruesome death (and in the process doing the galaxy a HUGE favor). If he had not been killed by himself in a struggle for control over eight lousy planets galactic domination, he would have become the most powerful Sith alive. But this did not happen.

Powers and abilities
Many of Darth Elmo's Powers and abilities were unknown. He was most known for his ability to appear innocent and surprise his victims with his treacherousness. He also mastered Force treachery, he used it when he betrayed and murdered himself. The rest of his abilities are unknown because he was so powerful that he could hide his abilities from the galaxy using Force Hide and Seek. He was one of the few Sith to master Force Bore to Death, a very deadly power.

Appearances

 * The life of Darth Elmo
 * The life of Darth Elmo
 * The life of Darth Elmo while writing "The life of Darth Elmo"
 * The life of Darth Elmo while writing "The life of Darth Elmo while writing 'The life of Darth Elmo'"
 * The life of Darth Elmo while writing "The life of Darth Elmo while writing 'The life of Darth Elmo while writing 'The life of Darth Elmo'"
 * The Simpsons, behind the scenes
 * Elmo and order
 * Tales of Darth Jawa
 * A dark apprentice
 * Darth Jawa and Darth Elmo
 * Making more Jawa Juice
 * The story of Darth Darth Binks

Notes and references
